Well I’ve heard my mother in law
Is knocking at my door
With a loaded shotgun in her hands
Says she’s going to make me pay
Her daughters in the family way
Going to bury me under Cromwell sands
Now my neighbours are egging her on
Cause me and them don’t get on
To me though, it’s just an error
She says I better do the right thing
Buy her daughter a wedding ring
Come out here and talk or I’ll bury ya
Me I’m off to the local spell maker
To get something to take her
Away from here she’s doing my head in
I’m getting the ingredients for a potion
To put my mother in law in motion
On a plane or train back to bedlam
I have the recipe wrote down here
Now I have to put it into gear
Two snails, a beetle and a dead shrew
Ear of a bat, tail of a rat, one ants knees
Some nettle leaves, green bark of trees
Slime of a toad when it’s new
Now I’ll mix it with her gin
Well before she gets in
It’ll cloud up her memory
Then when she drinks it down
She’ll be off home the other side of town
And forget all about me, whoopee |  |
